The Wine Drunk Ask Me Anything

I'm fully sloshed and I have things to say.

Hey. You. You can ask me anything here.

Here it is. The crown jewel. My greatest literary work to date. A wine drunk AMA. Drink. Type. Post. WHEEEEE!

What are the biggest business insights you have learned from men you have slept with?
Oh god. A partner can fuck you, forever. A contract can fuck you, forever. A bad marriage can apply pressure on you like a diamond, and you’ll start living at the office, and you’ll build a wildly successful company (life hack!!!). That after the first company, you’ll obsess over the second company (ego). And then you’ll rat hole unless it’s bigger. Hmmmm….if you spend a lot of money on insurance, get together with your rich buddies and buy out a firm. I learn so many things.

Do you think people play the Sims because it’s the life they want to live? Or do they like the control?
Okay, as a Sims addict: I can tell you 100% it is about creating stories. I use the Sims as a place to house copies of all my ex boyfriends and their wives and kids and parents and friends, and then my friends, and then a bunch of random people I like. My hairdresser, and my favorite strippers, and all my coworkers, and my boss. I put them all in one town. And then I see what happens.

We all go to the nightclub. My boss fucks a stripper. My hairdresser starts having a lesbian affair with my ex boyfriend’s wife. I’m not exercising dominant control over people I know, I’m giggling at them. Also half the fun of a Sims world like this is sending out screenshot updates like “Your Sim got my Sim pregnant” etc.

As far as Bella’s Sim goes, right now, I have 4 dogs and I used all the cheats to become rich. Then I built myself a mansion with one room for each of my boyfriends and secret passages in the walls to spy on them through (they are not allowed to cheat on me, only I am allowed to cheat).

Maybe I don’t play the same way other people play? To understand how I play the Sims, please refer to the Youtuber CallMeKevin. He and I have the same play style. We start cults and stuff.

How is building up your escorting clientele going?
I have such a hard time mentally thinking in terms of “clientele”. The whole thing cracks me up. I’m definitely doing some unique things with emotional closeness, oversharing. Arguably parasocial. But I love it and I’m not stopping lol. I want to play stupid games and win stupid prizes! Wheeee! I want all the prizes what are the prizessss!!

Finding the people I’m interested in is fairly easy. Slow trickle. I just signal to them. Heavily. I smack them with wit, insider references, and then a little sprinkling of T&A. There’s an immediate mutual recognition. My existence is almost a sigh of relief to them. They know the deal, or they want to know the deal.

I’ll write it on the internet, finally, just to save everyone time. If I’m not properly screaming it in every channel of my “marketing”. I like founders, CEOs, and financiers. VCs. Business owners. Entrepreneurs. I like the big dawgs. 30s or 40s. I have space to see like maybe 5. Maybe 10 someday if everyone ignores me because they are busy (I will kill them). These people have crazy schedules and disappear for months. I don’t want anyone else. Everyone else go away.

There are 2 archetypes of people I am hunting:

20s/30s, finance/tech, wants to blow off steam (maybe new to this flavor of hookup?).

40s, perhaps married, wants a super smart discrete adventure partner.

I would only consider outside this framework for an amazing personality fit. But I’m not optimizing for you lmaoooo.

On a multi hour date, how many “rounds” is a guy allowed? Is it just once and it’s over or is the expectation a guy can pop 2-3 times (if its reasonable, not a sex doll situation)

I feel like my target demo would never type these words. The word “pop” is a streetwalker word.
But, for the actually good ones who want to know:
Sometimes we fuck like rabbits on a date.

And uh…FYI. I can only imagine how much pressure it is to randomly do a whirlwind thing with a Weirdo Dream Girl™️. Maybe you are married. Maybe you are too busy to date a ton. We can go again if I go too tiger during sex and it’s done fast.

How is escorting going?
Again. Another one. Same question. From my blog fan club. I am physically incapable of shutting up, so sure, I’ll share more.

I made my profile about six months ago. When a guy I was seeing told me that if he didn’t see me, he’d hire an escort. For his events. One like me. To be a part time gf, like me. I was like: huh, okay, bet.

I didn’t take my search seriously until I had an amazing inquiry and realized the type of men I like were here, and I wanted another one, lol. In this capacity.

The market that I am cornering here, is being the ultimate part time, on demand girlfriend to very busy men. Public facing, if needed (which is a blast). A date, a fuckbuddy, a business trip stowaway.

And I’m a discretion wizard. I take this so so so seriously. An anon consulting LLC to move money through, if needed. I can spin up custom invoices, company websites, billing@domain.com emails. You can pay my LLC a monthly retainer to hide things better. NDAs. Protonmail, Signal. If you want to know how deep I go, read my neurotic discretion guide. I wrote this months ago and I classify it as level 1. I’m on level 2 now. Needs updating.

This is part of the reason I don’t care about the Everyman. It’s not my skill set! I am building LLCs over here!! They are not for you!! They are for people who will have forensic accountants on their ass, EAs breathing down their necks.

This is a long term play based on what I actually want. I decline a hilariously high dollar amount of dates every month because it is not a fit. It’s not about the money, making the most money, none of that. I have a type, and a system, and a thing I want. I half do this for the rush and I can’t really get that outside of my type.

This absolute bubble of privilege is not lost on me. I LOVE MY BUBBLE!!

Favorite video game?
Minecraft. Pokemon. Borderlands.

Most you’ve ever made in a day as Bella?
35 thousand dollars. It is a long story. I was bribed. To be dead honest, we then did a repeat, 35 again. I will monologue about this story in person if you want lol. It’s kind of crazy.

This sounds like some disgusting sex thing. Really it was a rich man flexing on me. Getting his way. Controlling me. Sometimes I like being controlled.

What would an evening with Gio and you look like?
Context: Gio is my real life NYC friend. Who would see hotties w me. If we are compatible, and this becomes relevant to you: with multiple women on a date, we go to dinner or do some activity, and it’s delightfully chaotic because it’s like you have a mini sorority with you and we are all chatty and laughing. We fight to ask you questions. And then, we rock your world.

This can be more lowkey: hotel suite party! I just had one of those with my friend Daphne in SF. She was jealous of me out on my date and joined us. It was a completley last minute idea. Unreal.

If you are socially awkward, go for a threesome with girls who are friends.

How often do you actually have an enjoyable sexual experience with a client?
Oh lord you guys do not understand me. Every time. Every single time. I just know what I want, I do the vetting on the front end, if I say yes to the date, sparks will fly. It’s also not even how someone looks, it’s who they are, what caliber of person they are, how they type etc. I can just detect if I will like you.

Cracks me up when good ones slide into my OnlyFans, anon. One conversation in, and I’m like, damn. You need to pull trig on meeting me in person and come get it lol.

To be dead honest, I walk into every first date prepared to just feel it out, and if I was wrong about compatibility, I would give back the money and leave. I have never ever had to do that, but yeah I am 100% attraction based. Any other women with this orientation – please let’s be friends! I feel so alone lol. I tried to post about it on Reddit once and they all made fun of me.

Most memorable non luxury experience, as a companion? Something simple or down to earth?
I am so sorry, but I just racked my brain for 20 minutes, and all my experiences have been luxurious. I like this world FOR the access. Bella, over the years, has grown accustomed to a certain lifestyle, lmao.

5 star hotels are really, really important to me. Cmon’, it’s my fantasy, it’s my day off, it’s my little treat. Get the suiteeeee.

Luckily, the people I am best fit with, eat, sleep and breathe expensive, fun shit. They live in a movie. I am in a supporting role. YAYYY!

That said, when the chemistry is there, everything is fun. We could go to a hot dog cart and it would be fun. OOOoooh I thought of one. I have a very lovely memory of someone holding my hand and walking me to a smoke shop because my vape died. And an evening where I LOVED making out with a guy in public at a nightclub.

That’s normal, right?

Do you talk to your parents?
Yeah. Constantly. They are hilarious and retired and send me 17 selfies a day with mimosas screwing off.

Lovers by decade! Name qualities that you like and don’t like about men in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, 50’s and 60’s. How do lovers in each of these decades of life stack up?

20s: I wouldn’t know. I have not had sex with a man in his 20s since college. I am totally into late 20s tho. Hot! Tight!

30s: Hell yes!! THEY ARE STARTING TO LISTEN!! Handsome handsome handsome, high energy, a lot of ego. Fuck yeah. 30s are elite.

40s: Perhaps the greatest men on earth. They do not care. Amazing in bed. Hell yes.

50s-60s: The question beyond 50 becomes do we have chemistry? Idk. Maybe I’ll be into it when I’m in 30s, maybe I’ll love em’? If you manage to be Jensen Huang level of cool, you could hypothetically be dynamite in the sack. Idk. I don’t chase these men around. For someone else.

How did you become a SW? What made you want to go into the industry?
Well, I dated a few rich guys, some married, and I realized that if I made a website with scantily clad photos of myself, they could find me more easily, and I could trick them into funding my MBA and investments directly instead of paying my rent. Rent does not build equity. And of course, married men must pay the “you aren’t going to marry me” tax. It’s high, and structured, here. And the whole thing is a rush, honestly.

What pets have you had?
I grew up with dogs! I LOVE DOGS!!

What’s your current obsession? Tv/game/history/story
I think I’m gonna sit on my current obsession next week.

In all seriousness, I love the Studio and Your Friends and Neighbors on Apple TV right now. And I’m really in the thick of it reading the Expanse series.

My actual current obsession is onboarding a personal assistant. It is so god damn fun, she is going to make my life so easy. I finally GET AN EA!! HA HA!! Now my EA and your EA can decide when we are getting together!! Kidding, kidding, that would be bad for opsec, she will not be involved in any details of what I do here other than booking my flights. And moving my nail appointments.

My EA wears a frog headband at all times on Zoom and I would die for her. Little frog ears.

Largest amount of money or financial value that you’ve personally risked on some kind of bet or uncertain outcome? What about most valuable non-financial thing you’ve risked (e.g. emotion, priceless sentimental heirloom, a decision/opportunity you turned down)?
Hmmmmm Bella doesn’t like FINANCIAL risk. Bella has been robbed. Thinking about this makes me feel sick. Skip skip skip.

I risk all control over my emotions every time I let a man inside me, lol. The things you do there can cement yourself in my brain, forever.

Have you had any embarrassing or funny moments doing this?
HAHAHA. Oh god. I have had a lot of funny moments. The one source of embarrassment that comes to mind is my early website/ad/X. There were like 2 weeks where I just copied everyone else. With horrible photos my friend took of me on a trip. Filler fluff. And slowly I redid my copy.

And then I got an inquiry that validated the exact type of men I like are on here. And I realized I should run it like an executive search. That’s what this is.

As far as funny…I watched my lover go up the hanging cold plunge bucket at the Aman, ask “I wonder what this rope does?!”, and dunk his fully clothed self in ice water recently. That was a highlight.

Also, one time I drank so much with a guy that at 7 am he woke up SCREAMING, violently hungover, in his sleep and we both just lost it laughing. No more Old Fashioned’s for us.

I don’t think I have been the one to do anything super duper embarrassing yet. I’m sure I will at some point.

What food don’t you like?
I hate Bleu Cheese and Gorgonzola. Disgusting. Cheese is supposed to taste good and these cheeses taste like moldy lies.

Where’s somewhere you want to go?
A lot of the travel that interests me is born from festering jealousy, based on the people I am around. There are some properties I lust over. Post Ranch Inn. Yellowstone Club. Aman Venice. Aman Tokyo.

I want more Europe. Asia. I like all kinds of travel. Stowed away in a hotel room entertaining myself on your business trip. Fabulous gallivanting. Yurt. Show up and figure it out. I like making friends at bars. I like making friends everywhere.

I’m, admittedly, a little bit of princess but I grew up sailing, which is basically camping. And I love to hike.

I actually haven’t traveled that much internationally because I have been having a baller career for 6 years and hoarding my money. It’s bad and my little roster and I are working on it lol. This is kind of cool because you can show me places for the first time.

Thoughts on collaborating with someone (male) as duo service?
This does not interest my target market and I’m not that freaky-deaky. I like adding in women.

What are you bad at?
Being quiet lol

Why didn’t you reply to my email? Didn’t even say a polite no, damn
I am so so so sorry. I’ve tried declining dates every which manner. One time someone emailed me a photo of a gun after I politely said no. That was it. I just don’t reply anymore. I’m attraction based. I have a very specific type. 99% nos from me. Finance, tech, founder, owner, CEO, 30s, 40s best. 20s cool too. And people who don’t make sense with me publicly are bad for my Opsec. I know too many people, in my personal life.

You seem to know a lot about finance/business. Are you an investment analyst or accountant in your day job?
I’m not writing my title on my slut blog, but I’m pretty damn smart. Also, a complete and utter idiot. An idiot who studied Econ.

How often do you masterbait? How often are you horney?
I can’t breatheeeee. If you’re trying to bait a response with these spellings, congrats. I’m here. I’m disgusted. These answers are irrelevant to you. Let’s move on lol.

Would rather get banged to high heaven and back or eaten like you never been eaten before? Have to pick one.
Banged with a lot of lube and a finger/vibe on my clit. God, I’m answering this for free outside the locked horny OnlyFans AMA. I’m soooo nice.

I’m actually coming back to this on a later date, editing, and I really can’t decide. Ugh.

Do you ever think about exes during sex with someone new?
No. If I wanted to fuck my exes I’d respond to their texts. LOL.

I am addicted to new relationship energy. That is what is so fun about this world. With scarcity introduced because of differences in location, marital status, and busy schedules…I can’t have the ones I want all the time. So we sit, suspended, in the most fun part.

If you ever wonder what I’m doing…I’m suspended there. Delighted, suspended.

What’s your long game here? Like where does this go in 5 years?
Oh lord. I haven’t thought this far ahead. All I know is that there are people I see who do not have permission to stop fucking me.

What’s something men with $100M+ tend to have in common?
A bitch wife. Kids they love, a lot.

What’s your “whale” acquisition funnel like? (Honest answer pls.)
Hahahaaaaaaa how do you know this terminology? For those lost: a whale is someone who you see regularly who spends a lot of money on you. Erm, it’s the whole funnel. I don’t really chase anyone who couldn’t see me regularly or take me on a multi-day trips. We don’t actually have to go that hard, see each other all the time, or do the trip. I just like chasing it. LMAO.

Those are the memories and experiences I really want.

Is chemistry real or socially constructed?
Weird question. I’m assuming that when you say chemistry, you mean the fun shit that lights up your brain. Not long-term compatibility. Not kids and Costco and stability. Fire.

How could that be a social construct? It’s chemical.

First, dopamine. Anticipation drug. You get a hit of this during flirting, waiting, wanting. Dopamine is fired during the chase. Not when you get the reward. For gambling addicts, it hits while the roulette wheel spins. In the breathless gap left there.

So if anyone is chasing, it’s gonna be addictive.

Here there’s some of that. You chase me first, just to get me to reply.
Then we chase each other. To schedule. To coordinate. I never know when, or how long, or where, or if again. Neither do you. It’s chaotic. It’s unsustainable. It’s a fucking rush.

And then, oxytocin. The bonding drug. The one I get when we touch, when we kiss, when I let you look me in the eyes. The one that doesn’t care if we’re compatible, and only cares that we were close. And tells me “more of that, forever, please”.

Yes. I think chemistry is real.

Favorite position?
CEO. Founder.

Have you ever been jealous of another escort?
I have no idea what everyone else is doing. Or what I’m doing.
Ok, confession though, if certain people I see bring up other girls (like any hot girls that they know), I 100% feel pang of jealousy which is absolutely hilarious. Provided that I am recruiting for my basketball team of sponsors. I’m ridiculous. But no, everyone has their lane, I know my lane. I’m happy. Some of the waist to hip ratios on X are crazy though! Awuuuuga!

I think you are dumb, as a woman, if you are competing in any circles where your only value is being the hottest one. You’ll age. You need an edge.

What are your clients like?
The men in my life are fucking winners.

Do you ever cyberstalk mens wives?
I have like comically few people I see, so, yeah. I get bored and I try.

Be honest: how often do you Google your clients?
All the time. Mommy needs to watch the new interviewsssss

Do you ever get lonely doing this?
I don’t like the moment where you are sitting in the amazing suite, and your lover leaves you to catch a meeting, or to catch a flight, and you sit there alone like “I’m not done yet wtf”. That’s not loneliness though. That’s what it’s all about.

If you could go to space with any of your lovers, what kind of guy would it be?
I would bring the whole little squad because I am convinced that if I put them in a room, they would be best friends. I just know this in my heart. They need to be friends. They’d be boys.

Have you ever orgasmed from kissing alone?
No wtf do you know how women work?

What do you wish you could say to every girl just starting in this world?
Iterate. Fast. My iteration was RAPID. I walked in with a lot of awareness and understanding of the circles I wanted to play in. I dated them, already. But I had to figure out how to reach them this way. Still figuring.

The way to iterate is to take the people you like, and ask them how they found you, and why they picked you. And then lean into whatever they say.

Maybe I can’t give you any advice. If you are just optimizing for money, I don’t have any advice for you. Optimizing for money, appears to be “Cast a wide net”. I am doing a Different Thing.

What lie do you tell most often in this work?
Silence is often a lie. An “I’m not thinking about you” lie. Hehe.

What are you currently reading?
These men to filth

What are you really good at?
Yap, yap, yappity yappin.

What’s the most psycho thing you’ve done because of a crush?
I’m a writer. I’ll write about ya. Heart wrenching shit. I’ll change your name, and I won’t publish it anywhere.

What percentage of your success is branding vs reality?
This is such a funny question. Someone on my OnlyFans found my secret burner Reddit and was like “oh it goes back years, you weren’t lying” (it’s wiped now, don’t go looking). I didn’t even realize people would think this.

If anything my branding is like…lame. I go on amazing dates and then I have a drinkypoo and I go home and I have captured, truly, the most heinous photos you have ever seen in your life. I was at the Aman being massaged in a spa house, and the only documentation I can provide are 6 blurry photos of the Japanese toilets. I was, evidently, quite enamored with them.

I’m mostly trying to show all the experiences I’ve loved, so that people who like that vibe, and live that life, reach out.

I was working on Twitter growth for a second, but I think it’s pointless. Viral photos reach the Everyman. Bella does not want him.

Are you ever scared someone will fall in love with you too hard? What do you do when they do?
Everyone I see: open invite to ask me out or leave your wife for me. Caution, I am an expensive gf lol. Just kidding. Not an issue so far, normally the life situations they are in prevent this.

Future Bella returning to comment: LOL I was a naive little bunny here, yeah this happens, both ways. Not an issue. We are smart people and adults. God does it make the sex good.

Is there one trait your favorite clients all have in common?
Okay. I’ve had wine. I’ll be honest. There is a Litmus test, if you will. The common thread cracks me up: they think the words gay and retarded are funny and don’t take life too seriously. Side note, these words are funny. They are hyperbolic descriptors that are not rooted in violence. This a hill I’ll die on.

In a similar vein, they do not care about my nicotine addiction. They love nicotine lol. And Adderall.

Also, the people I see LIKE that I am a normal person. If you go looking for an “escort”, you see a lot of professional porn bots. They like that at the end of day, I’m some girl in sweatpants optimizing her super hero life in between her meetings.

And then, they are a little floored with my ability to keep up. I have dated a BFD (big fucking deal) before. I own the wardrobe and I know everything. I have had a front row seat to these circles for years. I’ve seen all the dark stuff. I know your life, bucko.

I’ll add a story here. Someone divulged to me that when he first made all his money, he had a few months where he walked around in head to toe Versace like an absolute prick (normal phase). So I go, “Yeah, and then one day, a billionaire at your golf club told you you looked like a dick, and he brought you to Loro Piana. Right?”. And yeah. That’s what happened to him. Brought him to a tailor, actually. But still. I know things. I know how things go.

If someone wanted to emotionally destroy you in under five words, what should they say?
Judging me for doing this, while you hire me. Any words related to that. Ooo, that would tear me up.

Can I request specific positions?
I’m so sorry I am sitting here cackling imagining a CEO leaning over his laptop typing this. That’s not you. That’s fine. If you want to go see a girl and do specific positions, think through how you rizz this. Like think through a way to do this in person and make it cool. I fear this sounds very uncool.

I like when a guy has position ideas. But rizz is required. If you have rizz, you can fold me up however you want me.

Do you take P411 verification?
No, why are you on there, slut? LOL.

For anyone lost: this is an escort review site, where people review girls. The whole idea is that you can join there, verify your identity once with the company, never have to share your real info with a girl, check her reviews, and then go see her.

I’m not doing volume. I’m much more of a fractional girlfriend. I want like 5 pookies. And I want to know who you are before I accept a date with you because I am attraction based. Half the fun, right there. Who you are.

I want to see you but the whole screening and real world identity thing freaks me out
I’m reworking the way I approach screening right now. For anyone lost: screening is the part of this where I make you tell me exactly who you are, in order to meet me.

From my side, screening has 2 points:

Do I want to see you? Am I attracted? Do I find you intriguing, impressive etc. Are you going to wine and dine me and take me to a 5 star? Are you going to be smarter than me and slap me with some ridiculously good conversation about high flying business things I find enthralling? Are you nice? Do I even want you?

Safety. Do you beat women? Do you have a record? Are you impersonating someone and trying to kidnap me? LOLOL

40 year old CEOs who know the deal and submit full info and photos of them cheesing holding their ID – I appreciate you.

30 year old financiers and tech boys who are nervous. I see you. I get it if you don’t want a paper trail. I might work with you.

What’s the last interesting convo you had on a date?
I was discussing phishing/hacking with someone smart. Apparently, to this day, the best way to hack big companies is to follow the C suite around, and bait them with an “Italy Vacation 2025” USB drive on the ground. This cracks me up. Dumb dumb executives.

Fascinating that the ultimate hack is an appeal to someone’s humanity. The do gooder nature. Isn’t the C suite supposed to be full of dark triad sociopaths? Guess not. They pick up the drives. Awww, cuties. Bleeding hearts. Call me.

What’s the last surprising convo you had on a date?
I was tipped off, for the first time, that people who haven’t done this whole thing before worry about profiles being law enforcement.

If this is a concern for you…we can talk on Signal. You can also see my entire asshole on OnlyFans. And, I implore you to noodle on who would invent a girl this weird and only give her C cups? I’m much more likely to be a spy or doing corporate espionage. I want to do that. Where do I sign up to be a spy and do corporate espionage? YAY, more jobs for Bella!

What’s something people wouldn’t guess about escorting?
Ok fun tidbit: if you frequent 5 star hotels, it is a best practice to tip all the staff with hundreds like MoneyBags McGee / Mr. Peanut. To remain in good standing. Previously, when I just dated Important People, we never really went to hotels. So I didn’t get to see this lol.

What snack makes you feel safest?
Weird question. Weird answer. Entire jar of olives :)

Were you a strange kid?
Alright. Love that you can smell this on me. Yeah. I think the camps were how I got weird.
I went to historical reenactment camp where I wore a hoop skirt and bonnet and milked cows. Golf camp. Jesus camp (tried to stage multiple atheist revolutions). Science museum camp where I built robot dogs and was BFFs with a deaf girl who made up a sign for my name that was sort of just the middle finger (maybe she didn’t like me??). She flipped me off all summer.

Chess camp, where I didn’t listen and did cartwheels outside on the lawn, until they noticed I was missing and came to collect me. “12 years olds with helicopter moms taking college courses” camp, where myself and a some kids from Argentina started a fight club and beat the hell of of each other in the dorm rooms.

I was likely a normal level of weird. I REALLY liked funeral homes. Just thought they were pretty. The big white colonials. Played a lot of Wii Tennis. Was obsessed with SpongeBob shaped popsicles from the ice cream truck. The ones that half melt and look demonic. I still like those.

My parents often compare me to the velociraptors in Jurassic Park, as an adolescent. I would not stay in the cage. They put limits on my internet usage to make me sleep. I logged into the router and changed the time zone so it was blocked for me during school day only. Ya know. Velociraptor things.

I don’t know what I said in here. I think I meant all of it.

Xoxo,
Bella